It’s got me into some pretty sticky situations over the years and is one of my greatest fears...
One way to reduce the chances of us falling into this trap is to have a ‘solid’ soundboard around us.... not one that just pumps us up but one that will actually hold us accountable and challenge us as well.
At @themomentumlifestyle we call it ‘championing and challenging’ and the science behind it is pretty interesting.
Too much ‘championing’ (or support) and it’s easy for us to develop a dependence on it where we actually become addicted (your brain gets flooded with dopamine from it) to the feelings of ease, comfort and security.
Get the right amount of challenge (especially growing up) and you can develop strength, humility, groundedness and independence that helps us step up when we need to, meet our challenges and be better at taking responsibility.
Not only that but the right balance between the two literally reshapes the brain.
Dr. Tasha Eurich talks about why it’s so important to find people who will tell us the truth no matter what when the majority of us are practitioners of politeness.
One of the big reasons is that it heightens our awareness.
She talks about internal vs external awareness.
Internal is about seeing yourself clearly and having a deep understanding of things like your values, passions, aspirations, reactions etc. While external awareness is about understanding yourself from the outside - that is, how others’ see you, and without being consumed by what others’ think, it can give you some incredible insights that you can’t see by yourself.
Her research also showed the strong correlations between ‘successful’ people (and people of influence) and how often their state of internal AND external awareness can actually deteriorate as they climb in status from having too many ‘yes’ people around them and no one to hold them accountable or strong enough to tell them the truth.
Long story short - find yourself a strong, solid soundboard. It’ll do you massive favours in the long run.